You were right

Dear S,

I was who I was and I was in that phase where I’d rebel against any authority and against any advice given to me. It was the first time in my life where I experienced real freedom and being truly on my own. Freedom that was hard fought through a sequence of rebellious action. I had no idea what I was doing and the only life skill I had was how to do well on paper tests.

So it was without any thought that I’d lash back at any type of advice given from an authoritative source because up until that point in my life, advice was given in order to put me down and show me exactly how much I sucked at things so I could be redirected to the “correct” path. I was never good enough and I hated feeling that way.

I am sorry that you were the one that got the brunt of my psychological trauma… if your intentions were well meaning. I want you to know that I did take your advice to heart and have become a more well rounded person. Who am I kidding. I got here NOT because of some grand revelation at the end of some spiritual journey, but because I no longer need to prove that I am somebody.

No matter the circumstances, because my memory of that time isn’t as precise as I can remember, I did learn a few things about life  from you so I am grateful for that.