Dream state

Been dreaming quite a lot lately. Interesting ones serving as a great fountain of enlightenment. For starters, I noticed that the dream self has become more direct and with a commanding presence. It doesn’t run away from troubles, but doesn’t attack either (I secretly wish it’d be more predatory). It doesn’t feel scared when people harass it either which accurately reflect my real world response. I used to have to suppress the fear and embarrassment in a difficult situation first, now I feel more anger and righteousness which doesn’t get so overwhelming that it prevents me from thinking.

I still have some relapses of waking dreams in which I was aware that I was dreaming. The problem with waking dreams is that they are very mentally taxing and gets even more so as the objects and events you try to influence in your dreams increases because your conscious mind has to track them and check against my own preconception. “The feel of skin is this way, the sound of a train is that.” But I learned the the biggest lesson from these waking dreams only when I meditated one day and reflected on some of the unconscious dreams I remember. There were no sensory inputs. Everything that happened in dreams were just perceived events. I realized that it was after I woke up from the dream that I associated sensory information to them. If I look deeper at moments I thought I had “seen”, “heard” or “felt” in my dreams I couldn’t remember exactly what was felt.

It is passed on to me from a more experienced dreamer that with more practice, I should be able to put things on automatic but the eventual outcome of that is boredom. You can’t learn or experience any unexpected things from your dream if they are all under control. The trick is to let go, but remain conscious enough so you can reflect on the experience when you do wake up. Dreaming is a learning experience to perform the unexpected, it is also a window into your true self without the bravado and stripped of any armor you have. It is your naked self in its ugliness and glory.