The reason

The reason why I didn't want my dance partner working at the same place as me is exactly the event that occured today.

We started discussing our schedule together and she started accusing me of never being available to practice in the weekends… “Excuse me, you are the one who always plans some trip in the weekend and cancel, move it again and cancel again.” I realized as soon as I said :” Oh so it's all me eh?” Then I forced myself to say forget it and walked away.

It frustrates me that I have to surpress my anger at a place that I consider fun and relaxing. WORK ! Yes work, a place where I know everyone and that I don't have to worry about Sarah, where my dance life has no link to. Now I have to deal with this shit everywhere I go. It also angers me that she is ignorant enough to not see that I don't want none of this shit at work and the fact that she'd try to start a fight at work is just outright stupid. Has she no tact at dealing with people? No she does not.

Flashes of our phone conversation now came back where she complained about her old dance partner. On how he doesn't talk to her or do things for her. Now I understand why. It wasn't because he's anti social or weird, it's because the way she talks angers people so much that they don't want to deal with her.

I am now able to pin point exactly why she infuriate me so. She would accuse me of something if it doesn't fit into how she wants things to pan out. Even if I told her that I am visiting my parents 1 week in advance, she accuse me of not wanting to practice. Her need to know exactly why I can't practice a certain date if the reason is not good enough she whines about me forgoing practice for some stupid excuse I have for not practicing. All the while, she does the same thing herself, yet not accepting that others does it.

I hate it that I can't dump her now. After so much money has been put into making our routines, I want to compete a few times before it all goes to waste.

So much dissapointments in life, I can almost expect trouble with every turn of the corner, everything I am pushing for. I feel really tired today and I don't know if I can keep the smile on my face anymore.